Fans of “How I Met Your Mother” will be pleased to know that for today’s review, Ren and I decided to take inspiration from a Robin Sparkles music video entitled “Let’s go to the Mall”. After all, what better way to take reprieve from the stressors of the Stampede than by eating some food court curry. In this case, at Rasoee in SouthCentre’s newly renovated chow zone. (matt)

Calgary is not my favourite place to be during Stampede. Despite this, I've actually been in the city, or at my parent's cottage an hour away for about 29 of my possible 31 opportunities. However, I've never actually attended (unless you count one time at sneak-a-peek....which I don't). To me, the Stampede is mostly an inconvenience. All my favourite watering holes fill up with people, who have never been there before and won't ever be back. The roads fill up with cars that don't know where they're going. And, the streets fill up with fat chicks wearing way too much make-up and way too few clothes. (ren)

Rasoee seems to be attempting to capitalize on 2 emerging trends. Firstly, the introduction of curry into food courts. We have seen this in at least 2 other venues (Tiffin at Mount Royal College and Clay Oven in Gulf Canada Square). We welcome this trend since one can really only eat so much Manchu Wok before he starts to “wig out” and has to be escorted off the premises by a Paul Blart lookalike for assaulting a janitor or Sunglass Hut attendant (I don’t know which is worse: Making reference to the Mall Cop movie or admitting that the said example is based on personal experience). The second trend Rasoee seems to be in-line with, is the concept of franchising the curry business. We think this is a horrible idea. The owners of the now defunct Kabuli Grill found out the hard way that curry is not something that can be mass produced, gift wrapped and institutionalized. (matt)

The big potential problem with food court curry, is that the speed necessary to compete with the genuine fast food restaurants is not achievable with freshly made indian food. While I like pretty much any alternative to the McDonalds, A&W, Dairy Queen, Burger King, cartel of death....I don't know if Indian is the ideal solution. The only way to make indian fast enough to compete is to do it buffet/cafeteria style. Indian is the perfect food for buffet line, but in this town....the skill seems to have eluded the curry community. And while I agree that curry should not be mass produced, or institutionalized, I definitely think it should be gift-wrapped. Preferably a big bowl of gift-wrapped shahi paneer for my next birthday if you could oblige. (ren)

For once, the location of today’s restaurant was closer to my house than it was to Ren’s home in the northeast. As such, Ren dropped by my place before we made our way over to SouthCentre. On the way, Ren told me numerous amusing anecdotes about the practice of community pharmacy as it relates to Stampede revelry. Included in this discussion was the disturbing trend of women incorporating a stop-off at the drug store for Plan B during their “Walk of Shame”. Ladies, please. At least go home and change your clothes first. No pharmacist wants to smell that. (matt)

Now, while I might come across as an irreverent bastard on here, I do take my career seriously. I try to show every patient who comes to me at least the same amount of respect that they show me. If someone crosses me though, I think it is well within my professional right to give it right back to them. I definitely understand the embarrassment and discomfort that asking the pharmacist for Plan B can cause a woman. However, this experience could be made a lot easier for both of us if you didn't have 3 girlfriends giggling from 10 feet away and if you didn't have the word "Whore" written in permanent black marker across your tits. Maybe if it was across your shirt, in the area of your tits. But seriously.....right on them, all the way across? Was that necessary? (ren)

We must admit we had some serious doubts that Rasoee would be worthwhile. After all, the last time we reviewed a place with that name, we ended up having to drink cucumber water. On tonight’s occasion, we were greeted by an eager cashier who doled out a Dixie cup sample of the chicken curry. As I suspected, it was poor. But I figured, “what the hell, how bad could the rest of the meal be?” At least this time I was guaranteed that I wouldn’t be waiting an hour while the staff brought me the wrong dish twice. (matt)

At first glance, Rasoee is a very professional looking operation. With a couple of big screen HDTV's displaying the menu, and a rolling advertisement for the business, bright lighting, and a nice clean atmosphere, it certainly looked like a nice alternative to the cartel of death. But what do appearances matter to dodgy curry reviewers? Not a whole heck of a lot. We're actually disappointed when there is no evidence of vermin, or suspect hygeine. Rasoee was going to have to impress us some other way. (ren)

You have the option of going with 1, 2 or 3 curries. All for less than 10 dollars. At least one of your choices must be a veg dish. You can also substitute one of your curries for a samosa or naan. But since the dishes already come with rice and the mark-up on a piece of naan is nearly as much as it is for Coke, you’d be foolish to do that. Remember the rule people: Rice or Naan, not both. The other option you have is to ask them to “make it hot”. That’s probably not a bad idea as they undoubtedly dumb down the spice for the palates of your average mall goer (15 yr old girls, senior citizens, people who think the retail sector is important, other douche bags). Other choices on the computer monitor styled menu board include curry bowls and an intriguing curry wrap. I ordered butter chicken, lamb curry and chole. With a mango lassi, my total came to $12.60. Ren had butter chicken, beef curry and muttar paneer. With his fountain drink, his total was less than $10. While the lassi was good, I can’t argue with a 49 cent beverage option. (matt)

In the spirit of the Stampede I once again go with the beef curry. It was more than acceptable. The butter chicken definitely tasted more of cream than tomato which is essential to me, and the mutter paneer was good enough. I probably would have gone with the chole if matty hadn't already ordered it, but I wasn't disappointed in my second choice. I agree with matty that you should only eat rice or naan. However I'm also a carb-addicted fat bastard, and I routinely have both. In this case I didn't since I didn't want to substitute an entire curry option for a piece. I really couldn't justify that option. (ren)

We were pleasantly surprised by the quality of the food. By no means did we hate it. The butter chicken was appropriately sour. The lamb tasted like lamb. The chole could have been a little spicier but I wouldn’t complain too much. The rice was basmati-tastic. (matt)

The dishes might have been a bit on the runny side.....but not to the point that I'd complain about it. I'd definitely return to Rasoee if I ever head to south centre again. (ren)

Our hunger satisfied, we left the food court and ventured into the bastion of North American culture that is the modern mall. With the money that Ren saved on his beverage, we thought we’d have enough to buy the Lego Taj Mahal from Great White Toys, Comics and Games. This delusion was shattered at the cash register when the total came to $649.99. We had to resort to doing our own Walk of Shame and left the store empty handed with our tails between our legs, while the acne faced employees laughed and pointed at us. Damn virgins. (matt)

We also made sure to enter and exit the mall through the shoppers drug mart. Not because we actually like them or their business practices, but there's always that slight chance that we might actually know the pharmacist working. However, we didn't. Oh well. (ren)

Leaving the mall, we drove to the 1600 Bierhaus in Glenmore Landing. We finished our night over pints of DeKoninck and Marston’s Pedigree while discussing the similarities between Star Wars and various Japanese films as well as whether Ren’s beard made him look like a rabbi. Only the important stuff really. (matt)

The beers were completely unrelated to the curry, but they were the perfect cap to a pretty good evening. We went into this review of Rasoee fully expecting it to be a disaster. 5-6 tops. But they certainly measured up and provided a decent dining experience. They'd never be able to compete as a stand-alone up in Castleridge, but when going head to head with the other food court options, they are the cream of the crop. (ren)

As far as scoring today’s curry experience, we are going to give Rasoee a solid 7. If you have to be at the mall, this is a good option. Certainly better than Sbarro or Edo.

Not at the restaurant

• The Robot
• Jacoba Fransisca Maria Smulders (aka Robin Charles Scherbatsky)
• Brian Mulroney

Rating: